Monday, March 28, 2005


Well, all those who know me will easily testify to the fact that I never cry. NEVER cry. N-E-V-E-R C-R-Y!

I don't know why. It's just that I was never very good at expressing emotion and for some reason I would never cry. I could never cry.

Even through the most heart-wrenching incidents or events, I would always have a dry eye. I was very Chandler-like in that respect. In fact I would normally try to break the melancholy or awkwardness with some joke, which would then result in my getting disapproving stares from all around.

So it will come as a surprise to most that I have cried twice in the last three days! And I've now realized that it's not all that hard to do so. I used to wonder how girls could let the tears flow so easily, but I'm now beginning to believe it's not the toughest thing in the world. I guess it's all in the first time.

Both occasions were the result of my reading a mail. Email to be more precise. The emails were dated 30th Dec and 31st Dec, and it's not the first time I'd read them. The only difference was this time, I didn't try not to cry.

I was alone both times and so no one has seen me cry yet. I guess that's one thing that's going to be even tougher to overcome - actually being able to let the tears out in front of other people. I'm not sure when (or even if) I'll be able to do that but it sure would be better to have a shoulder to cry on.

Anyways, it does feel nice to let all that emotion out instead of keeping it inside...

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