Saturday, June 17, 2006

Who Will Win the World Cup?

Everyone's trying to predict the winner of the ongoing FIFA World Cup. And since I have been asked to voice my opinion on the same, I'll add one to that count.

Most people I know would attempt to undertake such an endeavor based on factors as banal and irrelevant as team form, team success in the recent past, quality of players in the team etc. All this, of course, is quite useless. So we shall have to make our prediction on factors that do play an important role in deciding a team's success.


a. Hairstyles:

A little know fact, but stupid hairstyles are the single most important factor in determining the winner of a major championship. Let's look at some stupid hairstyles from the last World Cup in 2002.

a. Ronaldo wore the most atrocious hairstyle ever seen in a World Cup Final match -- the "half moon on forehead". Brazil, as we all know, won the Cup and Ronaldo finished top scorer.

b. Germany's run to the Final was helped more by Christian Ziege, I opine, than Kahn's brilliance in goal.

c. You were surprised by Turkey's 3rd place finish? I'll explain how that came about. It's simple, really. Umit Davala.

d. USA progressed to the quarterfinals -- an amazing feat for a nation where 89.34% of the population thinks the only form of "football" in the world involves men in tights and wearing helmets and shoulder-pads throwing an oval shaped ball to each other. I give you the reason -- Clint Mathis.

I predict this year too, teams with players sporting the worst hairdos will do the best. Is Ronaldinho's bad enough? I'm not sure.


b. Post Goal Celebrations:

The crazier a team's celebrations after scoring a goal are, the more likely they are to do well in the Cup. I offer Senegal as a brilliant example of the same. No one is likely to forget their post goal antics in 2002, and as we all know, they proved to be one of the big surprise teams of the Championship.

Which team has the stupidest celebrations this time around? I haven't seen enough matches to make the call on this one. But I'm sure those teams are going to do great!


c. The '82 Symmetry Effect:

Football, like the rest of life, has a lot to do with numerology, the supernatural, the occult and other nonsense of this kind. If you look at the list of World Cup winners down the years, you'll see that they form a strange symmetry on either side of the 1982 Cup which Italy won. 1978 and 1986 (+/- 4 years from 1982) were won by Argentina. 1974 and 1990 (+/- 8 years) were both won by Germany. 1970 and 1994 (+/- 12 years) were both won by Brazil as were again the 1960 and 2002 Cups (+/- 20 years).

Of course, the 1966-1998 (+/- 16 years) pair proves to be the exception. However, this is easily explained by the fact that even the omnipotent spirits felt that giving a terrible team like England the Cup twice was too unbelievable for the common man to digest. Hence, in the name of promoting Anglo-French relations, 1998 was decided to be France's.

This of course means that this year's winner will be the team to have won it in 1958 -- Brazil. Well, what with Ronaldinho's hair and this sure sign, I wouldn't bet against them. Would you?

[I swear, if I see one of the Brazilian players doing a little African dance after scoring a goal in the next game I'm calling up Ladbrokes.]

7 comments:

_ð!®†ß¤¥ said...

GlSeriously dude, your analyses of things of this sort is frankly getting really sucky.. Guess its time you switched profession or something and gave your blog and its readers a break, unless of course you do improve your act..

Really arnold, pathetic wouldn't suffice.. Just an honest opinion..

anvesh kharbanda said...

based on current form its argentina who's gonna win ...and for none of the reasons mentioned in ur blog ..but simply because they play sublime football ...

yes said...

AV,無碼,a片免費看,自拍貼圖,伊莉,微風論壇,成人聊天室,成人電影,成人文學,成人貼圖區,成人網站,一葉情貼圖片區,色情漫畫,言情小說,情色論壇,臺灣情色網,色情影片,色情,成人影城,080視訊聊天室,a片,A漫,h漫,麗的色遊戲,同志色教館,AV女優,SEX,咆哮小老鼠,85cc免費影片,正妹牆,ut聊天室,豆豆聊天室,聊天室,情色小說,aio,成人,微風成人,做愛,成人貼圖,18成人,嘟嘟成人網,aio交友愛情館,情色文學,色情小說,色情網站,情色,A片下載,嘟嘟情人色網,成人影片,成人圖片,成人文章,成人小說,成人漫畫,視訊聊天室,性愛,a片,AV女優,聊天室,情色

金城武takesi said...

That's actually really cool!!AV,無碼,a片免費看,自拍貼圖,伊莉,微風論壇,成人聊天室,成人電影,成人文學,成人貼圖區,成人網站,一葉情貼圖片區,色情漫畫,言情小說,情色論壇,臺灣情色網,色情影片,色情,成人影城,080視訊聊天室,a片,A漫,h漫,麗的色遊戲,同志色教館,AV女優,SEX,咆哮小老鼠,85cc免費影片,正妹牆,ut聊天室,豆豆聊天室,聊天室,情色小說,aio,成人,微風成人,做愛,成人貼圖,18成人,嘟嘟成人網,aio交友愛情館,情色文學,色情小說,色情網站,情色,A片下載,嘟嘟情人色網,成人影片,成人圖片,成人文章,成人小說,成人漫畫,視訊聊天室,性愛,a片,AV女優,聊天室,情色

job said...

AV,無碼,a片免費看,自拍貼圖,伊莉,微風論壇,成人聊天室,成人電影,成人文學,成人貼圖區,成人網站,一葉情貼圖片區,色情漫畫,言情小說,情色論壇,臺灣情色網,色情影片,色情,成人影城,080視訊聊天室,a片,A漫,h漫,麗的色遊戲,同志色教館,AV女優,SEX,咆哮小老鼠,85cc免費影片,正妹牆,ut聊天室,豆豆聊天室,聊天室,情色小說,aio,成人,微風成人,做愛,成人貼圖,18成人,嘟嘟成人網,aio交友愛情館,情色文學,色情小說,色情網站,情色,A片下載,嘟嘟情人色網,成人影片,成人圖片,成人文章,成人小說,成人漫畫,視訊聊天室,性愛,情色,日本a片,美女,成人圖片區

tiger said...

徵信社,徵信,徵信,徵信社,外遇,尋人,徵信公司,徵信,抓姦,徵信,徵信社,徵信,抓姦,抓姦,外遇,尋人,徵信公司,徵信,徵信,徵信社,徵信社,徵信,徵信社,徵信,外遇,尋人,徵信公司,徵信社,抓姦,徵信,外遇,徵信社,,徵信,徵信社,徵信,徵信社,徵信,徵信,徵信社,徵信社,徵信,徵信社,徵信,徵信社,徵信,徵信社,徵信,外遇,尋人,徵信公司,徵信,徵信社,徵信社,徵信,錄音,背叛,商標,商標,GPS,離婚

Miss jane said...

走光,色遊戲,情色自拍,kk俱樂部,好玩遊戲,免費遊戲,貼圖區,好玩遊戲區,中部人聊天室,情色視訊聊天室,聊天室ut,成人遊戲,免費成人影片,成人光碟,情色遊戲,情色a片,情色網,性愛自拍,美女寫真,亂倫,戀愛ING,免費視訊聊天,視訊聊天,成人短片,美女交友,美女遊戲,18禁,三級片,自拍,後宮電影院,85cc,免費影片,線上遊戲,色情遊戲,日本a片,美女,成人圖片區,avdvd,色情遊戲,情色貼圖,女優,偷拍,情色視訊,愛情小說,85cc成人片,成人貼圖站,成人論壇,080聊天室,080苗栗人聊天室,免費a片,視訊美女,視訊做愛,免費視訊,伊莉討論區,sogo論壇,台灣論壇,plus論壇,維克斯論壇,聊天室