Monday, October 30, 2006

Why I Really Like My Job

I often try to imagine what the Best Job in the World (BJITW) must be like. Okay, you can’t choose something like lying on a sunny beach all day, with scantily clad, bronze-colored ladies flitting around you, getting you drinks and pleasuring you in ways you didn’t imagine were possible. That’s NOT a job! What I’m looking for is something that is both:

1. Sufficiently feasible to actually exist, and
2. Pays you money for it.

The above described scenario misses out on both points, and so fails to qualify.

I have a desk-job myself. I’m pretty sure the BJITW can’t be a desk job. A desk job is rarely very interesting, and I’d have to think “interesting” plays a crucial role in picking any possible contender for the BJITW crown. But let’s take a little timeout to imagine what the best desk-job in the world would be like. (Or in other words, I’ll just describe an average day at the office for me!)

Here’s what it looks like:

11.00 am - Get to the office.
11.15 am - Check mail.
11.45 am - Get coffee with cute chick from neighboring cubicle. (Flirt shamelessly while doing so.)
12.15 pm - Tidy up desk a little.
12.45 pm - Call an early, extended lunch. (If possible, find another chick and flirt some more.)
2.00 pm - Sit through a couple of meetings while pretending to be awake. (Sleep will come easy thanks to the excess carbohydrates consumed during lunch.)
4.00 pm - Break for tea. (Yes, you get it by now -- more flirting.)
4.30 pm - Start deciding what work is to be done today.
5.30 pm - Decide it’s too late to start now.
5.45 pm - Check mail.
6.00 pm - Leave.

I have to think this is a pretty good deal. I know for sure that the above job exists and you get paid for it. You’ll notice, I could have suggested carrying a pillow and blanket in for the meetings or shortening the working hours a little bit. But I know that’s crossing over the line, and the job will no longer satisfy the two necessary conditions to qualify as a “job”.

What’s your job like? And what do you think the BJITW is?

7 comments:

Rachel said...

I have a desk job too. I work in a call center and have very specific breaks and lunches.

8:45 Start work and go to 15 minutes pre-shift meeting
9:00 start taking calls
10:45 15 minute break
11:00 back on phone
12:30 ½ hour lunch
1:00 back on phone
2:45 15 minute break
3:00 ½ hour for administration time a.k.a. 30 minutes to waste time
3:30 back on phone
5:00 leave for day

I think the BJITW is one that you get paid to do things that you have to do anyway.

Sleep study participant is my first choice.

Anonymous said...

According to me the BJITW is to be a "MUSICAL SCIENTIST"....This is not really a desk job and besides you can dart about you fellow lab mates without anyone really bothering!!!
Isn't this job really cool???
I guess everone MUST agree with me!

KD13 said...

To be a best selling author and to write sequels all day. That's got to be it!!! [I think I just described J.K.Rowling...]

And once again, since my question remains unanswered... who is Amy?

FifthBeatle said...

Rachel - Call center, huh? I thought all those jobs were outsourced to India! Sleep study participant seems to be a popular choice. A lot of people I asked have come up with that...

Diana - I'm not really sure what a musical scientist does... but whatever floats your boat..

karen13 - that's hard work, you know.. writing best-selling novels and all that...

anyway, to answer your question about "amy" -- well, i can't answer it here, since then everyone else will get to know too.. so i meant "ask me in private"...

Diana Kotwal said...

I hate to burst your bubble, but the BJITW doesn't exist. Primarily because a very critical part of working is whining about it...
"But I just had a monday last week waaaaaah....What my boss isn't dead yet??!!....whyyyyyy why won't they pay me to sleep all day whyyyyyyy????"

TBJITW would be seriously lacking in this department which automatically disqualifies it as a 'job'.

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a lot of whining to catch up on...

RT .. hXc?LqD said...

what u just described here is a software engineer's job!!!!!
ofcourse u do hell load of whining while in it .. but u make loadsa money PLUS u get 2 do all of the above! so get urself in2 one of those software giants!

oh well .. in case of all d women replace chick wid "hot shtuffs"(as sum of my lady friends like 2 call d dudes)!!

Anonymous said...

well my job is exactly wat u described!!!
cheers...