Sunday, March 12, 2006

Next Time Listen Carefully!

I was reading an old issue of Popular Science magazine in our college library last week, and one of the articles was titled ‘The Worst Jobs in Science’. Job no. 7 on that countdown list was ‘Semen Washer’!

These are the guys who do the dirty work down at the local sperm bank. No, not the ‘dirty’ work of donating, but the work of handling the donations that have already been made!

The article states,

“Laboriously prescreened "donors" emerge from a so-called collection room that is stocked with girlie mags and triple-X DVDs. They hand over their deposit, get their $75, and leave. The semen washers take the seminal goo and place a sample under the microscope for a sperm count. Next comes the washing. The techs spin the sample in a centrifuge to separate the "plasma" from the motile cells. Then they add a preservative, and it's off to the freezer, where it can stay for 20 years. Or not. Thanks to semen washers (and in vitro fertilization), more than 250,000 babies have been delivered in the U.S. since 1995.”

However, the part that interested me the most was the last paragraph. Diana Schillinger, the lab manager at one of the Los Angeles Sperm Banks, says,

“The hardest part is explaining it to friends. But we do have stories. Like the donor who was in the room for the longest time. We had a big discussion about who was going to check on him. Turns out he thought he had to fill up the entire specimen cup.”

Poor guy! That’s what happens when you don’t pay attention to instructions!


nina said...

ok...just for knowledge sake...what was the first rank job?

Anna said...

nice one..
there is a joke.. about a sperm bank that got robbed... and the thieves didnt know what was inside.. they wondered why the bank had so many glasses of lime juice.. but since they'd already got there, they decided to drink all the juice, anyway...


Anonymous said...

gross! :) isnt it great - guys getting money to pleasure themselves lol,.

SwitchBlade said...

Yo arnie, you've been tagged! check out my blog for further details.

Agarwaen Mormegil said...

lol dude..nice one. Of course, if the semen handlers are girls, then maybe it's not a bad thing after all.
Thanx for the techno update.

MaK-D said...

ummm....i think you should choose better magazines

Arnold said...

nina - well, i don't quite rmbr... but i have given you'll the link, so why don't you click and see?

anna - okaay! did that have to come while I was eating?!! don't know how i've kept my dinner down...

switchblade - ah! responsibilities! well, well!

aragorn - i dont think all the handlers are girls, dude... but wht was that supposed to mean anyways? ... and you're welcome!

mak-d - better magazines? umm.. wht can i do? all the sports mags are normally hogged so i cant get to them... and despite numerous requests on my part, the college library still refuses to subscribe to Playboy :(

nina said... 1 is "human lab rat"...while no. 10 is "Orangutan-Pee Collector"...where do they come up with this stuf....
@anna: u sick child!!!
@all guys: whats with guys playboy n cricket?totally unrelated i know!!!

nina said...

ok..urgent..please check my blog!!!

Arnold said...

nina - yea.. now that u mention it i do rmbr something about the orangutan pee colletor thing.. though i have NO idea why that wud even be a job!

sports and entertainment, the only fun things in life !! :)

the wannabe indian punkster said...

How can you fake a job like this?
If someone askes you what you work as...what can you say......without sounding like a gay loser perv?

MaK-D said...

try car magazines....btw is playboy available in India? if not you really think college can afford it?

Arnold said...

megha - c'mon.. at least it's not as bad as orangutan pee collector!! lol!

mak-d - nah, man! not very interested in car magazines... even 'E' is better than that!

KT said...

Pop Sci?? Arnold is a geek. arnold is a geek ... :-D

Arnold said...

kt - you might change your opinion on that if you realized what exactly i was scouring through the magazine looking for! ;)

Vincent said...

lol something to feel good about your current job!
Good find!

Explain this to me again,
so you get a room stocked with girlie mags and triple-X DVDs and they pay you $75 !??

And where is this place?

Arnold said...

vincent - one might be tempted to think 'heaven' at first... :)

but yea.. any sperm bank... give, my friend, and be happy! literally!

FateGlimpse said...

god almighty!