Why I Didn't Sleep With Alicia Silverstone

I’ve always wondered which of the following would sound cooler at a party:
1. I’ve slept with Angelina Jolie.
2. Angelina Jolie came onto me, but I turned her down.

This is a very important question to answer, since I want to be prepared in advance about what I should do in case the situation--of sleeping with her--should arise.

I, personally, think that the second statement sounds cooler. It puts you on a slightly higher level -- one where you can choose to turn down someone like AJ. But there’s a price to pay. You miss out on the pleasure of actually getting to sleep with her. I think the best strategy would therefore be to sleep with her and then lie about it, saying that you turned down the chance. (It also avoids a confrontation with a certain Mr. Pitt.)

Remember that the next time you get a chance to sleep with your favorite celebrity.