Sarcasm

People think humor is a difficult art. But I’ll let you in on a little secret. It isn’t. Not if you know the tricks to it.

People also think I’m funny. I’ll let you in on another little secret. George Bush is a pedophile.

There are many kinds of humor. There’s standup, there’s slapstick, there’s punning, there’s cheesy and the list goes on endlessly. All of them fall into two categories - those that are actually funny and those that are easy to pull off. These two categories are mutually exclusive. Hence a style of humor that is funny requires a fair deal of skill and one that doesn’t require much skill would probably fetch you more boos than guffaws

For example, punning usually draws a great deal of appreciation if done well. However, coming up with puns of a good quality is an art of extreme difficulty. Cheesy humor on the other hand is both produced and appreciated solely by people with single figure IQ’s.

However, there is one exception to this rule. Sarcasm.

Sarcasm is my favorite style of humor and I’ll show you why. Firstly, coming with a sarcastic repartee is as easy as pie. How hard can it get? All you have to do is say the opposite of what you mean!

For example, I meet a male friend wearing a frilly, pink shirt. I say, “Whoa! Nice shirt, mate! You look like a real lumberjack in that!” You mean, “Aohw! (the opposite of “Whoa”) Horrid shirt, Ma’am! You look as gay as Elton John liplocking with his boyfriend after a session of figure skating!” (Yes, I think figure skaters are gay. Sue me.)

Notice I have taken what I actually thought about the situation, and flipped everything around. That’s not very hard to do. Even you could do it. (A slight caveat here - I know of a guy who took this advice of “flipping everything around before doing it” a little too seriously. He couldn’t impregnate his wife for the longest time, and I think I know why!)

The next important point is that sarcasm is funny. Okay, maybe not to the person at the receiving end of it, but definitely to all others present. Master the art of sarcasm and you can be sure to rise up the popularity charts.

The final reason why I like sarcasm is because it pisses people off. A well made sarcastic jibe at a person can cause as much damage as a truckload of choicy expletives. (Of course, combining the both of them is a potent mixture best left to the experts.)

However, nothing in this world is ever all good. (Except Alicia Silverstone, but we’ll leave that aside for now.) Sarcasm itself has one major drawback. After a point, people stop believing you at all. Even when you’re telling the truth. I ought to know. That’s what my life is like right now!