Saturday, November 11, 2006

Why I Can’t Stand to Be Around Some Funny People

Someone once said, “In every group there’s always one guy who’s the the idiot that everyone hates. Look around and if you don’t see that person, you know it’s you.”

Okay, this post has nothing to do with either idiots, group-related properties or even pithy sayings for that matter. I just thought I’d say the above sentence in the beginning itself and get that out of the way. Now to get down to the meat of the matter at hand.

Have you ever noticed how there are some people who are consistently trying to say something humorous? It’s like a disease or something. No matter what the situation is, they’re trying to come up with a wisecrack. I’m talking about the guy who whispers to you at a funeral, “I’m not surprised they aren’t cremating him. Considering where he’s going, why bother?” Or the kind of sky-diving partner, who when he realizes -- midway through the jump -- that you can’t get either your parachute or safety chute open, says, “Hey! That’s what I call jumping to conclusions!” Well, you get the picture.

The other thing about these people is that whenever you say something funny, they’re always trying to top it. You crack a joke, and they’ll contrive to come up with a witty extension to it. Or an even funnier joke. Like it’s a competition of some sort. Because that’s the way they are -- they just HAVE to be funny! All the frickin’ time!

I hate these kind of people. I can really stand to be around them too much. And I’ll tell you why -- it’s because I AM one of them! And when two people from this God-forsaken race meet or are in the same room, it’s usually one crazy never-ending ping-pong game of wisecracks and repartee. Now that may be all fine and merry with the people standing around and watching, but I don’t enjoy it at all. When I say something funny, I’m looking for a little appreciation and a few laughs, not someone trying to jump on it and squish it with an even funnier line, sometimes even before I’m done speaking. Hell! That’s MY job!

For some strange reason, every group usually has one of these people, too. So these days, I’m always looking around. (If you see me suspiciously casting surreptitious glances at you, you now know why that is.) And as long I don’t see anyone fitting the description, I’m one happy camper.

8 comments:

Rachel said...

If I was in a room with you I would laugh at your jokes and not try and one up you.
My best friend is extremely funny and it is a joy to be around her.
She doesn't do the zinger kind of jokes. That is my speciality.
We tag team better than you could even imagine.

phantasmagoria said...

in my group also there is a friend who is so much like this.. he hates people being funnier than him.(i'm not sure why).mostly, im the other person.
but i've realised that i don't need others to laugh at my jokes all the time. it's sometimes only me who finds it funny enough to laugh at...
(and no im not seeing a shrink for that!)
:)

Arnold said...

rachel - pray enlighten me on that the "zinger kind" of jokes are.. personally, i don't mind people who do a different kind of comedy to mine.. so long as they dont try to come up with something EVERYTIME i open my mouth..

phantasmagoria - the reason he hates being around people who are funnier than he is simple.. he suffers from the problem that afflicts most red-blooded males around -- insecurity!! and for some reason he believes that a "sense of humor" is actually one of the things that girls look for in guys.. (thanks in large part to that fact that it's the most common lie used by females in "what do you look for in a guy?" surveys..)
put 2 and 2 together, and you understand the irony of the situation...

Rachel said...

Arnold ~ a zinger is a witty, often caustic remark.

LUDICROUS said...

Omiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii – exactly my thoughts!! I guess each one feels they’re smarter than the other and believes he/she should have the last laugh…. But with moi… it’s a bit different ;).. I try and try.. Then – laugh a bit, crack a bit…N… eventually end up laughing at myself!! Ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lara said...

=) as soon as i read the title, i knew it was a very -you like- post. LOL
*sigh...chandler.
so these people are another reason you need the snake and porsha back-up huh? if someone manages to top your joke, you can just whip them out and retrieve the "attention".

The Moon Topples said...

Great post. I think I have this affliction as well, although in my advancing years, I'd be likely to keep quiet during a funeral or the certain death thing.

konika said...

Didn't Dane Cook say that? Something about a douchebag?